Wednesday, June 16, 2010
The perfect ambiance.
Ephesians 2:10, "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." I have been writing for a few months now. There are days that I walk around, and I have so many thoughts and ideas going through my head, that I can't seem to get to a piece of paper fast enough, to write them all down. I am beginning to think, that I might have to break down and buy me a hand held tape recorder, so I can spit my ideas out a little easier. I'm not complaining. Believe me, I love my reawakened passion and gift for writing. It has been a breath of fresh air for me. I am humbled and grateful that God is using me. It's just very different from what I am used to. Different..but good. I am a wife, a mother, and a housekeeper by trade. On a normal day, before my writing started, the biggest thing I had to wrap my brain around, was if I should use Lysol wipes or 409 spray on the countertops. I worried about getting the kids to school on time and without them killing one another, making it to work on time, getting my boss' laundry and mine done all in the same day, getting home to see my husband for a few minutes before he started his night shift, paying the bills, making sure the dog didn't chew up another pair of flip-flops, and getting supper on the table before 7:oo. All the while, not forgetting to pray, and pray hard. (I'm still searching for the telelphone booth, where I can put my SuperWoman constume on!) But, as crazy as it is, I wouldn't change it for a minute. Writing is just an added role, to an already adored life. I just have one problem, my office. Until now, the room I write in, has actually been called "the green room". A name, given to it by my children, because of it's hideous green linoleum flooring. Our house is about sixty five years old, and I am willing to bet, the green floor is just as old. To top it all off, the walls are dark wood paneling. When we moved into the house, we placed our computer desk in the room, so that is where we connected our internet service. Like it or not, this is where I do most of my writing, and all of my blogging. My laptop, the newest thing in the room, sits on an old computer desk. It is also where I have placed my printer and a few cd's that are waiting to be downloaded. In the top drawer are; pens, pencils, a stapler, a new journal, and an emergency pack of red twizzlers. Yes...I said emergency. You never know what will happen, and when it does, I will be prepared with my pack of twizzler candy. To the left of my desk, is a dented up filing cabinet, barely hanging on and trying to live out it's purpose. (Did I mention that I am too cheap to buy a new one?) To the right of my desk, sits my grandfather's black rocker recliner, which I inherited after he passed away, with a hand made, New Orleans Saints blanket, draped over the back of it. We recently purchased a small deep freezer, which sits caddy-cornered on the left side of the room. Behind me, in the other corner, is an old wooden rocking chair. It belonged to my great grandmother Hortense, which that in itself, makes it priceless. On the back side of the room, on either side of the wall, are several shelves. It is where we keep movies and family photo albums. Along the ceiling wall, to the left of my desk is one long shelf. It is where we keep all of the trophies, that our kids have recieved in sports, spelling bees, writing contests, etc. Near the doorway to the room, I have a small nightstand. It holds several books that I have purchased, but still not read, a candle that I often light to help the room smell inviting, and a small elegant lamp that creates a soft light. I find, that soft lighting helps me center my thoughts and creates a feel of relaxation in the room. We also have our kids' bicycles lying up against an old wooden console television. One of the kids' bikes was stolen a while back, so we keep them inside in fear of it happening again. Oh..I almost forgot. This is also the room, where we keep the cat's litter box. It is tucked away in a corner, where no one can see it. The smell is far from inviting. Every so often, when I am in my office, trying to relax and type my thoughts, I begin to hear the faint sound of the cat urinating. Nice. And if I am lucky, he might jump up on my grandfather's recliner and begin licking his inner thigh. Real nice. ( I am positive that cats do yoga) As you can tell, the room is in desperate need of renovations. My newest conquest is to create the perfect ambiance in the room. Ambiance is the environment or the atmosphere around you. Well, I need a whole new atmosphere! It's time to make some changes. I started out with going to Lowe's today, to pick out the color paint I wanted to do the walls in. There are about a million and one different paint colors. This may take a while. I am also trying to decide if I should go with carpet, or put wood flooring in. I can't decide. I may need to call on the family decorator for this one. While contemplating my new plan for my "new office", I failed to remember what is truly happening in the room. I've been so worried about changing it, I seemed to be forgetting what God is doing within the room, and with my writing. I was online the other day, checking out my facebook, and I had put on my status that I had experienced a bad day. I began looking through my page, when someone popped up on my chat window. It was a very dear friend of mine (and distant family member) who I hadn't seen or spoken to in over a year. She quickly responded to my having a bad day, and made a smile come to my face. She then began thanking me for writing my blog. She said that she was a frequent reader, and had even took the time to read older blogs that were posted before she began reading it. She explained how she was being blessed by it and that she was even sharing it with a coworker. She asked me not to stop, and said she looked forward to reading my book.(still deep in the works) I was overwhelmed with emotion....and cried. I had no idea that she even knew about the blog, much less that she was reading it every day. The fact that she was being blessed by it, was the best part of it all. A true witness. You see, God can even use me in the messiest of places. The truth is, He could care less about what the room looks like. He can work anywhere and with anyone. Because, even in the midst of the smell of cat urine, He is using me to get out His message of love. Here I am, worried about the way the room looked, and wanting to create the perfect ambiance, when God was busy working. All He needed was a willing vessel. He needed me to submit to His perfect will. God will take your gift to places you can't imagine, and to some places that you won't even know about. To submit to God is to give into or surrender to His authority. Where we allow His authority to work within us, is where He will create the perfect ambiance. That is all He is asking us to do...to surrender our own will, for His. He will do the rest. The perfect ambiance God needs, is within our hearts. Simply, the willingness to do His work. Will I paint my office? Most likely and probably very soon! What I won't do, is forget, that even in the midst of a chaotic mess, God will use me if I am willing. All I need to do, is ...say "Yes". Go ahead...say "Yes", and watch God work! Proverbs 3:5-6, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths."