Where we are.

 

 

 

"Seek the presence of God and hang on to Him.  Go where He goes and let Him fight for you.  Invariably when we're most exhausted, we'll find we're expending more energy fighting the enemy than we are seeking God's presence.  More than you seek to win, seek Christ! More than you seek victory, seek the Victor! As you do, you are binding yourself to His presence and trusting God to carry you into victory." ~~Beth Moore

 

 

 

 

 

I look at this picture and I almost don't recognize my own children.

Crazy right?

 Man, how they have all changed so much over the last year and a few months.

They are all so crazy amazing! We are so blessed.

 

It's been quite a long while since I have written in this space. My intentions are always to write, but the timing doesn't always fit with my intentions.  

This past year has been a full one.
 We've had lots of laughs and a few tears.  Some good times and some bad.  There were struggles and there have been victories. All in all, it's been a good one.

 

I'm happy to be able to have a little time to myself today, so

 I thought I'd help myself catch up on where we are.

 

So, if you're interested, this is

  where we are...

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

Amber is now 22 years old. Wow!

 

She is in Romania. 

 

 She has been there with CTI (Cross Training International) for almost 5 months now. 

 She is truly living out God's voice over her life. 

He spoke to her a few years ago, after her first trip to Romania, that He would send her back to live there for a time. 

 It is a powerful thing to watch God's words, His very breath over her, being lived out.

I am amazed at her faithfulness to her Father. I am amazed at her bravery to answer His call on her life.

I am in awe of the woman she has become.
And her smile...just radiant. She is stunning.

I am a proud, proud momma.

 

She is living there with the Romanian Master's Commission team and other CTI team members. She is loving it! She is ministering each day to the lost and the hurting. Truly being the hands and feet of Jesus.  She is also teaching a Sunday school class each week to a group of young Romanian children.  She is teaching them English. Her heart for children is such a beautiful thing that has unfolded over the past few years. She has become an amazing leader to the XMC team there.

 

I miss her. Terribly. Like, sobbing ugly cry terribly.

Communication is not always easy. She is on a 9 hour time difference and the few hours of the day that we are awake at the same time, doesn't always guarantee that we will get to chat.  Her schedule keeps her busy and mine, well, it has been crazy at times.

 

  I miss her sweet voice.  I miss the opportunity to just pick up the phone anytime I want and hear it. It's a luxury that I will no longer take for granted. Time is short. Oceans are far and wide.

And this momma misses her girl.

 

She returns home during the middle of September.

Oh, what a happy day that will be!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 



Kaitlyn is now 18 years old.
She is in absolute beauty.

She graduated high school this past May.

 

She wowed the entire auditorium with her graduation speech.

She wowed me with her extreme courage to do it.

She was my first homeschool graduate. She has made the scary choice to homeschool, four years ago, worth every second. She was a phenomenal student.

 

As I type, Kaitlyn is boarding a plane to return home from Seattle.

She has been working for most of the summer, saving up for her college tuition.  She has been working with the Event Force team for Microsoft Corporation during the past month, which has kept her out of state in Florida and Washington.

 

This girl is something else. She is smart and brave and funny and simply loves life.

She has a genuine love for people and for serving the Lord. She wants to travel and disciple others. That just makes my heart so full.  It's refreshing to watch her grow into the world changer I knew she would always be.
 I get to be her momma. That's pretty awesome.

 

She is beginning to take the tiny steps to walk out on that branch and take the awaited leap out of the nest.  Her wings have been practicing their flight over the past few months.

She is ready and excited to move into her dorm/apartment and  start college in the Fall where she will attend XMC.

She will do great.  I see her nurturing all her roommates and cooking meals for them. She is a giver. Always has been.  I also see their apartment full of joy. Wherever she is, you'd better be sure there will be much laughter.

 

Me? Well, ya know... I'd say it gets easier the more children you let go of, but I'd be lying.

It is a beautiful, yet hard process. Sort of like labor.

The tearing away of their bodies from yours. But, this time, they take your heart with them. I'm working on getting used to the process. It's a good tearing away, but not an easy one.

 Maybe, when Isaac leaves home in 16 years or so, I'll be a pro at it. (Or maybe not.)

 

I look forward to hugging her neck later tonight when she gets home.

Her face and her laughter have been missed around the house.

They will be missed even more, come September.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mason is now 12 years old.

Or, as he says it, "practically 13".

 

 Out of all the kids, he has definitely changed the most.

 

He will be starting 8th grade in just a few short weeks.

 

In their group picture above, his face was all babyish and soft and still a little squishy.

 

Now?

Well, he has facial hair,  he's 5'7" and 197 pounds!

He grew into a young man overnight, I think.

 

His voice is changing, his face is maturing and he's passed his dad up in shoe size!

 

What the hoohah is happening here?

I was not prepared for this.

  I've watched my girls become young women, and now, I'm watching my sweet baby boy become a man. What a beautiful, yet heart wrenching sight.

He's just a baby!

(Well, he's my baby.)

 

He just returned yesterday from Tween Camp. He talked and talked and talked for the first 4 hours and then he just passed out, practically mid sentence, on the way home.  Camp tired. That's the best tired.

 

He told us last night over supper, that he was filled with the Holy Spirit during one of their evening chapel services. He said it was the weirdest and best feeling he's ever experienced.

 

I did good, y'all... holding back the tears, as he shared his life changing news in his newly deepening pubescent voice.
(I was freaking out on the inside with tears and joy and all that jazz!)

 

He's growing up...so, so fast.

 

My heart is trying to stay caught up with all of it.  I'm doing my best to flow with all of the changes going on with everyone.

 

Mason is a sweet, sweet young man. He's a good helper and a hard worker.

He's looking forward to his sister moving out in September, so that he can finally have the
"big room".

He's also looking forward to the day that he can grow a beard, like his dad.

I'm not ready for that.

Not. at. all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Isaac is almost 2 years old.

 

He is a busy toddler who insists that he should live outside...all of the time!
(Even though his momma is allergic to the planet. Thank you, Lord, for anthihistamines!)

 

He is talking really well and beginning to show his own little personality.

His giggle is possibly the best sound I have ever heard.

 It is extremely contagious. It's simply the best.

 

He loves shoes, our rooster "Popcorn", playing with his best friend, Ren, praying and saying "Amen" at every meal, and watching Curious George.  He gives the best hugs and recently learned to say, "I wuvv oo."

I. just. melt. like. buttah.

 

He has come so very far since a year ago, when he had heart surgery.

We've had a few of our 1 year checkups since surgery, and for the most part, he is in great health. He no longer has the symptoms he had before surgery and it has been a blessing watching him enjoy life without being sick.

 

His sensory issues are up and down.  We have some really good days for the most part, but when we have bad days, they are really rough...with a capital RROOOUUUGH!

God is teaching me much about myself and how to be a mother, during this season with Isaac.

Much, much.

You'd think since my oldest is 22, I'd have this mothering thing in the bag by now. Ummm, not exactly. God is showing me that my kids aren't the only ones that are growing, or that need to grow.

(But, that's for another blog post.)

 

We are, however, in the middle of new medical tests. He's had some mild, yet persistent symptoms, over the past 6 months or more. An abnormal test result revealed that he could have something serious going on.  We are awaiting results right now.  We have several doctors appointments for this coming week.  We are praying and praying to receive some answers soon, and of course, for a perfect healing in his little body.

 

Until then, I am taking in each moment and trying not to forget to breathe.

I am reminding myself that God has our best intentions in mind. He always has.

 

My husband said it best,

"God's in control. He always has been. I don't want to work against what He wants to do in us, so I've just learned to go with it. His control is better than mine has ever been."

 

So true. Such a wise man.

 

 

 

 

As for me and this handsome stud, we are approaching our 24th wedding anniversary.

(Geez, we are old!)

 

We are doing our best to hold onto this fast train that our kids have us on.

They are all such a delight and we've enjoyed every part of this ride with them. We are ready to have them all under the same roof again. That will be a very good day, indeed.

We look forward to the season ahead of us. We do our best to embrace everything as it comes and not take one moment for granted.

 

At times, we feel so undeserving of the life we get to live.

 

Who knew a girl from the projects and a Cajun boy from the bayou would end up so crazy and wonderfully blessed!

 

God has been so very good to us.


"At the end of the day, I have a life that's good."
 

 

These days, we are doing our best to stay connected with one another. Life, these past couple of years, has caused us to get into a continuous motion of survival. Situations, beyond our control, have blindsided us and knocked us out of wack a bit. Life will do that sometimes. It doesn't ask permission before it does. Stuff just comes.

In the midst of being tossed about, we have forgotten, at times, why we jumped on this crazy train in the first place.

All because we were deeply and passionately in love.

We just wanted to breathe each other in, all of the time.

We wanted to love and laugh with each other, forever.

 

"Through sickness and in health. Through good times and bad. Until death do we part."

 

We are working our way back to that place with one another and enjoying doing so.

I am thankful for God's strength that has kept us afloat. He is quick to grab us when we begin to sink. His hand definitely does uphold us.

 

Frankie is an extraordinary man and a great partner. He leads our family well.

He makes me laugh until I snort. I love him so very much. He's my boo.

 This journey would not be worth living without him.

 

 

So, folks, that is exactly ...where we are.

 

God continues to show me, that through it all, and wherever we are... He is there.

 He is there in the good, the bad, the easy, the struggle, the laughter, the tears, the failures, the victories and in the midst of all the changes.

 

It's the sweetest thing, seeing His love ebb and flow through every area of our lives.

 

Nothing goes unseen by Him and nothing is a surprise to Him.

 

He is always there, watching over us.

 

Where we are...He simply is.

 

 

Psalms 33:18

"But the Lord watches over all who honor Him and trust His kindness."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



My friend Sam.

 

 

 

 

If you know me at all,

then you know I am an animal lover.

 

Except Racoons of course.

Bleckkk!

But that's a whole different blog post.

 

When I was little, I dreamed of being a Zookeeper and vowed to protect all of the animals of the world.

All of them.

 

Even though I didn't accomplish it, I think I came close.

 

I have 3 kids, 1 husband, 2 dogs, 2 cats, 1 kitten, 1 turtle, and 2 fish.

 

Yeah, I'm almost a Zookeeper.

 

Over the years we have housed and rescued countless dogs and cats.

 

Even though, I am allergic to both.

 

What can I say?

They just have a special place in my heart.

( I am very thankful for allergy meds!)

 

Which leads me to this guy, the handsome devil in the picture above.

The one that stirs my allergies up worse than a dust and mold storm.

(Apparently my love for him knows no boundaries.)

 

This is my friend Sam.

AKA Sambeaux.

AKA Poppa Sam.

 

He has graced our lives for almost 10 years now.

He is the pet that we have had the longest.

 

Ten years ago,

he trampled his cute little self onto a baseball field,

where my daughter was practicing baseball with her team.

My son, who was a little over one years old at the time,

scooped him up in his little arms,

brought him over to me, threw him in my lap,

and said,

"Hewe Momma."

 

That was it.

He's been in our family ever since.

 

He's been a faithful friend and companion to us.

He has survived two hurricanes, a separation and cuddled with me when I lost my Mom.

 

He is moody, yet lovable.

He is honory and stubborn, yet quite defined and proper.

 

He's a one man exterminator.

No bug, or mouse, or varment is safe in our house.

 

He is a brother to our children.

Yes, a brother.

 

My oldest daughter loves him so much, she calls him her husband.

Don't ask. It's complicated.

 

He sneaks into my bed each and every night,

 and lays his 20 pound self smack dab in the middle of me and my husband.

 He's quite the attention hog.

 

He is family. He is a loyal friend.

 

Call us silly. Call us crazy. But he has captured our heart.

 

We dearly love our Sam.

 

He spent last night away from us, at the Vet's office,

because he is sick and fighting for his life.

 

My heart is heavy for our big guy.

I am amazed at the tears I have cried over him the last two days.

 

I know he is just a cat to some,

but to us,

he is so much more than that.

 

I have to believe that God cares about the animals that we care about.

That even now, He hears our hearts cry.

 

Our family asks that you would say a prayer for our Sam.

 

If it be his time to go, then we pray that he go peacefully and with little pain.

 

But if it not be his time to go,

then we pray that his little spirit and body would grow stronger and stronger with each passing moment over the next day or so.

 

We pray for a miracle.

 

So that we could bring him home to us...

 where he belongs.

 

 

I appreciate you, friend, from the bottom of my heart.

 

Thank you.

 

 



When the rain won't cease.

 

 

 

 

Isaiah 44:3
For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground;
I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants.


I sit here on my couch, wrapped in a blanket.
listening to the rain fall on our roof.

As it hits the tin on the porch,
it creates its own melody.

I wonder, after three solid days,
will this rain ever end?

I look out of the diamond shaped window on my front door
to see what looks like ocean front property.

Our grass is covered in a blanket of water and new drops come and splash it with every passing second.

I wonder...
will this rain ever end?


For the course of a year,
we felt the rain fall on our lives.

It seemed as though the storms were never ending.

The rain just kept beating against us, time and time again.

My job became unbearable and God spoke into my heart to walk away from it,
to leave the burden, and the money.

My job, the money, they had slowly become my security.

But, He was all I really needed.
I had to simply trust Him.

Within a few weeks a spiral of storms began to hit us.

Tension filled our home and we began to use our words as weapons to jab one another with.
Our kids felt the blow of every hate filled word.
They each slowly pulled away, in their own way, putting space between our feud and their hearts.

Because of my recent job loss, we had to move out of our home that we had known and loved for over two years.

It was big and roomy, a perfect fit for our family of five.

We began to rebuild another home,
one much smaller than the one we were in.

One that held old memories of other storms.
Storms we wanted to forget.

But, we simply trusted Him.

We began to move out of our new home and rebuild our old one,
all the while our oldest was graduating highschool and preparing to leave home for college.

Another storm I was not ready to face.

Then He whispered to me saying,
"You will not return to work and you will homeschool your children."

The rain poured down on me.

I prayed that I had somehow misunderstood Him.

"How could I do that? I'm not prepared for that", I tried to explain to Him.

The rain, it came again.

My husband left his job to pursue an old trade,
because we just weren't making ends meet.

Things began to slowly get better and we were adjusting to our new life.

The sun peaked its head out.
Its rays kissed my cheek.

But not for long...
because the rain came again.


My daughter left home for college and it took all I had 
to keep my head above the water pounding down on me.
The letting go was not so easy.
I felt as though I was losing everything.

But, I trusted Him.

The rain continued to pour down on us.

This time, coming in a storm that would forever change us.

My husband had a stroke...
at 38 years old.
His body was weak and in need of therapy.
This strong man who took care of our family, was broken physically.
It left us with no income for over 8 weeks.

This rain...
 came with howling wind and roaring thunder.

I thought the rain would never cease.

We prayed,
"We don't know how much more we can take Lord? But, we will trust You. We will trust you."

I just wanted the rain to stop.

But this storm...
it was different than the others.

The rain poured in with something new.
Its melody made a sound I had never heard before.

The wind blew in with strength and power,
yet its gentle hand touched our shoulder.

The Thunder spoke into our lives saying,
"I'm right here. This is a new day. I'm working things out for your good. All things will be made new."

My husband, he found his way to the Cross.
His body and soul began to heal.
We began to love eachother in a new and better way, bringing life back into our marriage.
Provision rained down on our family, coming from every direction.
Debt was paid off.
We were given new friendships that would strengthen and carry us.
Our family found healing and restoration.
We all stood together as one and praised Him.
Our security, was found in Him.
 Our home felt like home... for the first time in a very long time.

We felt God's grace kiss our face and shine ever so brightly on our lives.


Isaiah 43:19
See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.


With rain comes new growth.
With every drop comes the promise of new life.

We were living in the desert, trying to make it in our own wasteland.

But God, He wanted to bring us out of it.
His desire for us was so much greater than our own.

He had a plan to grow something new,
but it took some rain to grow it.

It took some storms to blow out the old,
 to make room for the newness He had for our family.

All of the storms were His greatness unfolding within our lives.
Bringing us to a place in Him and
making us realize how much we truly needed Him.

It gave us a greater Love for Him and one another.

He never brings a storm without fulfilling His promise.

Looking back now,
I can see that those months of rain,
those storms that seemed to never cease,
they were the best thing to hit our family.

Today we are stronger than ever before and it was all God's doing.
It was all Him.
It was His grace, so sufficient, rushing into our lives.

When it looks like the rain won't cease,
trust Him to bring something new from it.

Know that He is with you, and hasn't left you.
He stands in the rain with you.
What falls on you, falls on Him.
He will carry you through.

His grace is always more than enough.

He brings hope to a hopeless place.

Believe that He is working for your good,
and that He has a miracle waiting just for you.

His Grace will shine upon you and brighten up your life!


Job 9:10
We'll never comprehend all the great things He does;
His miracle-surprises can't be counted.


Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.



The Momma Papparazzi

 

 

 

 

 A picture is worth a thousand words,

 but the memories are priceless.

 

 

Our little momma cat had kittens about two weeks ago.

 

Sadly, only one of them survived.

 

She has become very protective over the little guy that she has left.

 

I often try and take pictures of them together,

because, well,

they are just too cute.

 

The momma cat literally hugs her kitten. All the time.
She holds him between her two arms and cups her paws around him.

 

It is just sooooo adorable!

 

I did get one picture of them together,

but it wasn't easy.

 

You see...she hates my iPhone.

 

Seems crazy right?

 

Each time I go to take a picture of them together as they are hugging and snuggling,

she literally reaches her paw out in front of me to block the camera,

 and then covers up the kitten with her body while hiding her face from me.

 

As to say,

"No pictures. This is our moment. Leave us alone."

Maybe she knows that she will only have her little guy in her arms for so long,
before he gets big enough to leave her side. 

Maybe this momma cat has it all figured out.

 

Maybe the little personal and special moments need to be just that...

personal and special.

 

I often think of this,
 and wonder...
 am I taking for granted those special moments with my kids and my family?

 

A while back we were at Lowe's looking for some stuff my husband needed

to complete a job around the house.

 

We had our two youngest with us and they were acting a little silly.

The older one was pushing the younger one in one of those race car buggies.

 

Their faces were priceless and full of joy,

so of course...

I whipped out my iPhone and said,

"Yah look here, let me get a picture."

 

My son, nine years old at the time, snaps back quickly and says,

"Why? So you can put it on Facebook? We're trying to have fun here, Mom."

 

Out of the mouth of babes, right?

Man! Did that response hit me right in the kisser.

 

I hadn't realized how much my social media hobby was affecting them.

 

It's like he was saying,

"No pictures. This is our moment. Leave us alone."

 

Since then,

I have done my best to back off posting so much of

our personal and special moments on Facebook or Instagram.

 

I do share some, from time to time,

but I try not to make their moments with me my main focus.

 

I want to definitely respect their privacy and keep those personal and special moments,

which are apparently very important to them as well,

to a minimum.

I want to do just as our momma cat does with her little one,
 protect them and their memories. 

It can't be easy for my (our) kids.

 

They live in an era of social media bombardment.

 

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Google, Youtube...

not to mention their mom has her own blog.

 

Even though I want this blog to be a document of our journey as a family,

I have to remember...

that it's my document.

 

It's my choice to write about our journey, not theirs.

 

It makes me wonder sometimes, are we so busy trying to capture the moments of our lives,

that we don't really get to experience them?

Do we simply miss out on them trying to catch them?


Jim Elliot has a quote that says...

Wherever you are, be all there.

"Be" means to occupy a place or to exist.


How can we be all there, existing in the moment, if we are in our purse fumbling for our iPhone to capture the next exciting moment to share on Facebook?

Don't we actually end up missing the moment all together?
Or only getting part of it?

I have to be honest...
I've even made my kids reinact something they've done just so I can get it on my camera because I missed it the first time they did it.

Seriously?

And another thing...

what ever happened to the good old photo album?

 

I went through a few photo albums the other day as I was reminiscing on my husband's 40th birthday.

 

I really enjoyed looking at the old photos and it brought me back in time to special places we've experienced as a family.

My heart felt so full.

I have to say...
I do enjoy Facebook and all of my Instagram photos,
but they can't match up to those photo albums that sit on my shelf.

Do you know that I have an entire purse in my closet filled with film that was never developed?
Yeh...actual camera film. Not a disc, or a jump drive, but actual film!

I also have over 600 pictures on my iPhone that I'm proscrastinating to develop.
One wrong move or technical glitch on my phone and they could all get deleted!

Shame on me. Shame, shame, shame!

Those pictures could be safely tucked in a photo album somewhere.
I have vowed to myself to develop those pictures.
I've vowed to take more camera shots of my family
and then actually develop them and place them in new photo albums.

So when they want to look at pictures of our personal and special moments...
they will be just that.

They won't have to visit my Facebook or Instagram to see those moments.
They'll be right in front of them, in the privacy of our home.

Very personal and very special.

Who knows what the future may hold?

Who knows if social media will even exist in a few years?

But our memories,
our special moments together as a family,
the ones tucked away in my heart,
those will last forever.


I'm not saying that I am against social media all together,
or that I will never take another picture on my iPhone and share it.

I'm just going to find that healthy balance
 and take my family's feelings into consideration when I do.

I'm going to be more mindful.

I'm going to LIVE in the moments more,
instead of trying to capture them with my camera.

I'm only going to have my kids so close, for so long,
before they are old enough to leave home.

I want to be all there with them.

All there.
 

So,
you'll have to take my word for it on how stinkin' cute our new kitten is.

His hair stands up on his head like a little rock star.

Uuughhhh! So cute!

 

  

Tell me...
what are your feelings about social media?

Do we depend on it too much to capture and keep life's moments?

Please share your thoughts and opinion.

I'd love to know what you think.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



It was glorious!

 

 

 

 

  

Well,

the Christmas festivities have come to an end.

 

I spent the majority of the morning picking up the aftermath and

I have spent the rest of the day perfecting the art of laziness.

 

I must admit...I am a pretty good at it!

It's been glorious!

 

I blame today's laziness on yesterday's.

Apparently I didn't use all my lazy up so it rolled over into today.

 

Pure gloriousness!

(And yes, that is actually a word...I looked it up.)

 

Christmas Day was so very nice.

We did something we haven't done in over five years.

 

We stayed home all day!

 

All glorious day!

 

All. day.

 

Did I mention it was all day?

 

Because it was. All day.

 

It just makes me smile thinking about it.

 

I wore my pajamas all day!

 

I don't even think I brushed my hair,

in fact I know I didn't.

It was stinkin' great!

It was all matted and crazy looking all day.

 

All day!

 

Again...glorious.

 

We normally spend Christmas day elsewhere.

 

We wake up at "way too early thirty" and open all of our gifts.

Then we hurry up and get everyone bathed and dressed to be out the door by 11:00 to head to a relative's house for Christmas lunch and to spend the majority of the day.

We don't return until after dark and we are exhausted and way overstuffed with Christmas turkey.

 

Don't get me wrong...

that has been nice every year.

I love getting together for the holidays.

 

But, there is just something about staying home and doing nothing on Christmas Day.

 

Man,

it's nice.

 

We still woke up early to open gifts,

but it was after 7:00 am!

 

That's late for Christmas morning.

 

After opening our gifts and picking up the mess from it,

our oldest daughter read the 2nd chapter of Luke to all of us and my husband prayed over our day together.

 

It was such a sweet moment.

 

Then we moved around slowly and cooked our Christmas dinner,

which consisted of my husband's famous beef roast and potatoes (yum-my!),

yam casserole (also yummy!),

bowtie pasta with olive oil, garlic and basil (the yummiest!)

and some warm garlic bread.

Dessert consisted of cakeballs or whatever candy was in our stockings.

 

It was,

you guessed it...

glorious!

 

We played games with the kids, laughed at eachother's silliness and snacked around.

 

(I think they laughed at my hair once or twice, but I'm not positive.)

 

We ended the day with movies and more eating.

 

Glorious I tell ya...simply glorious!

 I caught myself several times looking all around at the kids playing and laughing together.
I would then look at my husband, and he was doing the same thing.
Then we would catch eachother's eye and just smile,
taking it all in.

It was just so great

to be just us...

all day.

 

I think we may have started a new tradition,

one that I could get very used to.

 

 

 

 

 



Christmas traditions.

 

 

I ventured out yesterday in hopes to finish my Christmas shopping.

 

I had high hopes of getting it all done in one clean sweep.

 

Well...

 

you know what?

 

I did!

 

With the assistance of two very entertaining Christmas helpers,

 

(Thank you Amber and Tray!)

 

I was quite successful.

 

Who knew two teenagers could be so good at shopping?

(insert sarcasm here)

 

I can't tell you how elated I was when the last present was purchased.

 

Oh happy day!!!

 

The two hours in traffic on the way home...

that's right,

2 hours...

didn't bother be as much as it normally would have,

 just because I knew I wouldn't have to return to the busyness of the city and shop again until after Christmas.

 

Wooohoooo!!

High fives all around and a happy dance for me!

 

Now that the Christmas shopping is complete and my daughter is home from college,

it is definitely beginning to feel like Christmas.

 

This is a bittersweet Christmas for us.

 

I think that our youngest is catching on to the whole

"Santa" bit and this will be our last Christmas with Santa.

(insert sad face here)

No more Santa.
No more cookies and milk set out on the mantle.
No more putting out sparkly oatmeal for the reindeers.
No more sneaking around like Christmas elves filling up the stockings.
No more.

Okay...let me just stop for a moment.
 

Yes...we did the Santa thing with our children.

 

They all know that Jesus is their Savior,

that He is the reason we live and breathe and have a season of celebration and giving.

He is the One we Glorify with our hearts and lives and He is our source for all things.
He is who we are made to worship.

Isaiah 9:6
For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.


They know that the fat guy,
who celebrates no-shave November year round,

he just brings presents on Christmas and eats the cookies.

 

That's it in a nutshell.

 

Moving on...

 

(insert sad face here, again)

 

So yeah...

we have a tradition at our house.

 

When the kids get of age and come to the realization that we are in fact the actual Santa,

they get to stay up with us on Christmas Eve and wrap the Santa gifts.

 

My husband makes frozen coffee with mountains of whip cream and chocolate sprinkles.

 

They are so yummy!

 

We stay up to the wee hours of Christmas morning laughing and reminiscing of Christmas pasts,
and the memories we have made as a family.

They get to help us devour the Christmas cookies left for Santa on the mantle and giggle with excitement,
like Santa's elves,
 as we sneak quietly to place the presents under the tree and fill the stockings.

Then,
when we all come down off of our caffeine and sugar high from those yummy frozen coffees,
 we crash until the younger ones, or one,
 wake up surprised once again on Christmas morning that Santa has visited our home.

It's quite magical.

It is honestly one of my favorite moments throughout the year.


My oldest daughter began helping us play the part of Santa quite a few years ago and our youngest daughter has joined the crew for the last couple of years.

And as I said,
I am sure that our little guy,
who just made double digits this past August,
will be joining us soon too.

But, then what?

Sigh...

I haven't got a clue.

I guess we will just have to start a new Christmas tradition.

I do hope,
that this tradition will live on one day with our own children and their little ones.

That would be sweet.

Speaking of sweet!

Now that all of the shopping is complete,
I can get on to more pressing business at hand.

Making cake balls!

I have over 300 in the freezer waiting to be dipped and decorated to give out to all of our family and friends for Christmas.

I've got some new decorating ideas that I am excited to try this year.

I just love giving them out to those I love.

My great grandmother always said,

"A way to a person's heart is through their stomach."

I think she may have been right about that.

I definitely haven't made any ememies giving away cake balls.


What traditions do you have in your home for Christmas?


Feel free to share them here in the comment section below,
or on my facebook page here.

 

Have a super fantastic day!

 

 

 

 



The 3D Mom

 

Matthew 6:33
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness,
 and all these things will be given to you as well.

 

I find myself feeling very 3-dimensional lately.

 

It's much different than the usual feelings of emotion

 that move and flow through my life on a daily basis.

 

I've had the privelege of being a mom to three amazing and awesome young people.

 

They have stretched my life and heart in ways unimaginable and I am better because of it.
I should have known when they were born into my life to take space within my heart, that the stretching was bound to happen to make room for more Love.

 

Their love, in many ways, has healed me.

But, I have wondered what God is up to from time to time in this whole mothering thing.

I've asked Him...
"Ughh, are you sure I can bend that way God? Because it feels like I'm just going to break right here, right now, in this very spot."

On some days, I actually have been broken...
but He is quick to pick me up and mend my brokenness, only making me stronger because of it.

Using my weakness to bring out strength.
 

He has challenged me in ways that I did not expect,

 like where I am right now.

 

There is a 5 to 6 year gap between each of my children.

 

A gap that I have well appreciated over the years.

One that I know God planned out perfectly just for our family.

 

And lately,

it's the one thing that has made me feel 3-dimensional.

They are all so very different and require something different from me in this particular season of life.

Dimension 1:
 

My oldest daughter has been out of our house for a year and a half now.

She began her second year of Master's Commission (Bible College) this past September.

She will be 20 years old in January.

 

And as I type that number above, I let out a big sigh.

 

A sigh of... "Where has the time gone? Where did my little blonde curly haired girl go?"

 

She is an amazing young woman who is filled with such greatness.

She is determined to change the world around her and

fulfill the calling on her life no matter what the cost.

 

Her love for God runs deep and thick within her veins

and pulsates the heart that beats inside her chest.

She is creative and talented and has a true compassion for others.
She has no idea how beautiful and amazing she is, her humility is genuine.
But, she radiates. Simply radiates.
 

I am one proud Momma of that brilliant girl.

 

Our relationship has changed over the past year or so.

She needs me but doesn't need me all at the same time.

 

She needs my heart and my ears to listen to her go on and on about her days and what God has done in and through her. 

 

She explains her goings-on with such passion and zest and feeling and

I love her for that.

 

She still needs my advice and my direction,
 but done gently, sort of in the shadows,
and in a way that I haven't had to before.

She needs me... to let go, but hold on.
 

She needs me to let her find her own way now,

and be there to help her if she needs a direction every now and then.

 

Oh yes,

our relationship has changed...

but I feel it's for the better.

 

I feel it's what she needs,

what I need.

 

It's the letting go but holding on just enough.

 

 Just enough.

I remember the way I felt a little over a year ago when she left home.  On the ride home I felt as though my heart had been ripped from my chest and I could not breathe in those moments.  I cried with my entire body feeling as though my soul was being emptied out.
The days and weeks after would get worse as I saw the emptiness in our home that she once filled with her laughter, her beautiful voice echoing through the halls as she sang and played her guitar in worship to her Savior, and her sweet smile.

My heart felt torn between who she was becoming and who God was calling me to be.

I thought those feelings would last forever.

I walked into the bathroom at church this past Sunday and saw my sweet friend crying, because she too had recently saw her son off to college the same way, and her heart was still raw where it had been torn with goodbyes.

I hugged her and said,
"It's okay to feel sad right now and this too shall pass.  One day you will celebrate where he is and your heart will heal."

I realized with those few words spoken, that that is just where I was now.

Even though there are days that I miss her so very much and I find myself staring at her empty chair at the kitchen table wishing things to be the way they once were,

I can now celebrate where she is and where I am.
My heart has healed.

What a gift to be her Mom, what a gift to be right where we are today.


Dimension 2:

My second daughter is 15.

This girl has rocked my world.

She couldn't be more opposite from her older sister,
but she is every bit as great and brilliant.

I learned through this young girl that no two children are alike and no two children can be parented the same.

She is unique in every way and I love her so much for that.

She is creative and passionate in all areas of life.
She is not just the brightness of the sun,
but she is the moon...
and if she had it her way,
she'd walk it one day.

She is adventurous and clever and her sweetness is felt by everyone she comes in contact with.

Her love for God is gentle and pure,
not outspoken...
but very personal.

She's beginning to find her way in who she is in Him
 and it has unlocked even more greatness within her.

 

 She needs me in the now. Today, right here.
She needs me to keep her life balanced as it wants to toss her around with new emotions,
choices and challenges.

She needs me to tell her "no" when her strong will screams "yes" to something that might not be the best for her.

Those days aren't always my favorite,
and they tear me in bits and sometimes drain me of all my energy causing me to hold my breath in emotional exhaustion.

But when she comes to me later waving her little white flag of surrender,
sometimes hidden in a little smile
or the tiny gesture of wanting me to sit in her room with her as she folds her clothes
or even in handing me half of her Smores Pop-tart,
I know, that my heart will live another day.

That we, her and I, are growing together.

Being her Mom has blessed my heart to overflowing.
This girl, in all her wonder,
will one day change the world around her.

Dimension 3:

My son just made 10 years old.
Yes, double digits. Meaning, no more little ones in our home.
I sigh, again.

He is the sweetest, most gentle creature I have ever met.

He came to us at a time when the hope for our growing family had ceased.

You would think that by now, I would be some sort of a pro at this whole mothering thing, but the rasing of this man child has definitely stretched me.

Girls I know, well somewhat, because I am one.
But this whole boy thing?

Wow.

How does a female raise a future man, leader of his one day family and home?

How?

I'm not all sure on most days, but I'm learning a little more every day.

I've actually begun reading,
Hope for the Weary Mom: Where God Meets You in Your Mess, A Guide to Raising Godly Men.

I know I won't find all the answers I seek within the pages of this book.
That can only be found in hiding myself in His grace, in His Word and in His presence,
but I do hope to find something that makes me feel a little more normal in my worry of what to do, or what to say, or how to breathe in all of this.


I've definitely mellowed out a bit with my son and have allowed my own mistakes to embrace the Grace that God has so freely given to me.

My little guy has made me smile until my face hurts.
He has the most contagious laugh.
He gives the best hugs.

He, has been my friend.

He is intelligent, yet quiet and courageous and very eager to find his way.

He asks me all the time what his gift is.

He wants so much to know his God-given purpose.
Even at such a young age,
he desires to know God and make Him known.

He lives and breathes video games and soccer,
 from the time he wakes up until the time he goes to bed at night.

The other day we were at soccer practice.
I watched him from my lawn chair as he listened intently at the other children talking around him.

He is so much like his father...a man of few words.

But when he speaks, you'd better believe what he says will have great depth, emotion and meaning.

I watch him listening to them, and I see the love in his eyes for his friend as one of them begins to down himself and his ability to be goalie in the next soccer game.

His little blue eyes filled with compassion stare on as he listens to his friend, never interupting him.

And then I see him put his little hand on the space behind his friend's neck rubbing his back, comforting him.

I hear him quietly say,
"You are a great goalie. You just have to believe in yourself."

My heart melts.

He holds the same characteristic as His Savior.
He is a friend among men.
An encourager.

He needs me, all of me, every day, all the time.

He has been this Momma's heart's delight.


So here I am, the 3D Mom.

Raising and loving three kids, who are all very different in mind, emotion, needs and age.
Whose life and heart is being stretched and pulled on some days...
yet fulfilled and blessed on most.

I find comfort in knowing that God is here with me every step of the way,
gently drawing me closer to Him,
 as I gently guide them closer to Him.

Being 3-dimensional means having more depth in the way you
 see and feel something. It gives you the opportunity of embracing something from all angles and all areas. 

3D allows you to have the full effect of something.

The full effect.

God has surely given me the full 3D effect as their Mom.
They have made me challenge myself, doubt myself, and love myself all in the same day.
They have brought out dimensions that I never even knew existed.
They have caused me to feel emotions I never knew I could.
They have caused me to love harder and feel stronger.
I would not be who I am without them.
 I feel blessed to embrace all of 3 of them in every season of their life and mine.

These 3 kids of mine have awakened my soul to new heights and more love than I could ever imagine.

They take up space within my heart and my life and
I wouldn't have it any other way.

We are heart roomies for life!

I want to embrace and see and feel it all.
Every ounce.

So, I'll continue doing my best to find my way in this whole mothering thing.
This wonderful and crazy journey, that shifts and winds and turns on the blink of an eye.

This unimaginable path, I have been honored to be on.

This Mom thing...them needing me to LOVE them with all that I am,
is the best thing,
ever.


Micah 6:8

But he's already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women.
It's quite simple:
Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love,
And don't take yourself too seriously--take God seriously.

How has motherhood stretched you?

Do you ever feel like a 3D Mom?

Please feel free to share in the comment section below.











 

 

 

 



Feet are very important.

Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

When I was a young girl, my very best friend was my great-grandmother Hortense.

She would come to visit us in the summers and give my Mom a "break" with us kids.

I adored her.

She would get up early in the morning and make homemade pancakes.

The warm aroma would pull me out of my bed and into the kitchen, where she had plates set out neatly and glasses waiting for cold milk to fill them up.

She would watch me play outside and listen to me rant on about my imaginary adventures I had that day.

If I were "misbehaving"  or had come "in and out" too many times through the storm door, she would make me sit next to her and watch The Price is Right and The Young and the Restless.

It was torture!

If I even thought of moving an inch, she would show me the fly swatter she held in her hand.

Boy, do I miss her.

She passed away at the wonderful age of 97.

97!

What a life!

When I became a teenager, the tables had turned a bit.

It was I that would go over to her house in the summertime and on weekends.

It was an opportunity for me to be with her all by myself.

She would "hire" me to do things for her like; clean her house,  paint her toenails and fingernails, roll her hair and check her mail.

I know now, that she just wanted to free me from my mother for a while.

She was my safe haven even in her nineties.

She would cook me cheese toast and make me warm milk.

We would sit down together and watch The Price is Right and The Young and the Restless, which I now loved.

She would hold her fly swatter beside her, in case the flies had come in the door as we came in from our walk together.

She didn't want them to land on our cheese toast.

Boy, do I miss her.

I remember one particular time that I was there visiting her for the weekend.

She asked me to clean out one of her closets for her.

As I removed the boxes, she would tell me what to keep or throw away or what I could have as a memory from her.

I pulled out a box with photo albums in it.

She told me to bring the box to her so we could look at the photos together.

She grabbed an album out of the box, and I kneeled next to her rocking chair to look at the pictures.

She began to explain how her and my great-grandfather traveled to many fascinating places.

She showed me pictures of when they visited The Holy Land and told me stories of the people and the beauty there.

Her eyes lit up as she glided her fingers over the pictures of her and my great-grandfather together.

She giggled as she continued to tell stories.

I could have stayed forever in that moment with her.

She continued on showing me pictures and then came upon the pictures of their visit to Rome.

Her words grew with excitement as she explained the uniqueness and history behind the city.

She said it was her favorite place out of all of their traveling adventures together.

As I watched her eyes shining towards the pictures, I said,

"Maybe I will get to go there one day."

She looked down at me and said,

"Oh, I believe you will."

I can still remember the way her eyes looked and how confident her voice sounded when she responded to me.

Boy, do I miss her.

Years later, I had my first child, Amber.

I hadn't seen my great-grandmother for a couple of years, and she had heard from my sister that I had just arrived home from the hospital.

She insisted that my sister pick her up and bring her to see Amber.

I was elated to see her walk through the door.

Standing holding Amber in my arms...

I was so proud in that moment.

She sat on the couch and asked to hold Amber right away.

With her shaking wrinkled hands, she took Amber into her arms and smiled the biggest smile.

 Boy, do I miss her smile.  She had the best smile.

She looked up at me and said,

"Can I see her toes?"

A little perplexed with her request, I laughed out loud and began taking Amber's socks off of her feet.

She looked down at them, smiled and rubbed them gently with her fingers.

"They are perfect." she said.

We stood quiet watching her hold her tiny little toes.

Never taking her eyes off of her little feet she said,

"Feet are very important.  They take you wherever you go.  And hers are good and strong."

I smiled proudly.

I didn't realize then the wisdom in those few words.

Boy, do I miss her wisdom.

As I wake up in my house this morning and sit down at my laptop to type this blog...

my daughter Amber is in Rome.

She is on a missions trip with her fellow classmates sharing the Gospel among the hurting people of Italy.

Her feet are walking the same ground that her great-great-grandmother once walked almost 59 years ago.

Her eyes are seeing the beauty that my sweet Hortense once saw.

Words can't express how happy and proud I am for her today.

I hope and pray that her eyes and heart take in all that is within her reach.

I pray that she witnesses a powerful move of God within the city streets of Rome.

I imagine, that one day...

 Amber will be sitting with her grandchildren and sharing her stories too.

Well, maybe I haven't gone to Rome like she hoped I would, but my Amber sure has.

So I guess...in a sense, a part of me is there.

Romans 10:15

And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!"