The night I outran the anaconda.

 

I think we can agree,
that as Mommas
we would do just about anything to keep our children healthy and safe.

There is something that takes over when your child is sick or in danger.

Some unmistakable strength and power.

We become "Wonder Women" in our own rights.

 

My little guy was sick with bronchitis.

It was his second bout with it in one month. He had caught a horrible relapse and this time the fever had gotten higher than his first time just a few weeks before.

I hurried to my bathroom and grabbed the Tylenol from the medicine cabinet.

I opened the bottle, and as I began to pour it into the small measuring cup, I noticed something wasn't right.

It was red. Cherry to be exact.

My little guy is allergic to RED.

I had accidentally purchased the wrong medicine.

Not sure why, because he has only been allergic to red for...I don't know,

his entire life!


I immediately called my neighbor to see if maybe she had some dye-free fever reducer on hand.

I was in luck!

She had grape...close enough.

I told my husband that I was going to run to the neighbor's house and grab the medicine.

He told me that he thought I should drive, because it was storming outside.

By this time, I had slipped on my cape and was already in Wonder Mom mode.


No need for an automobile.

I could fly

across the yard and be back in no time!

I threw on my jacket, grabbed some flip-flops, the appropriate foot wear for such a heroic feat, and headed out the door.


I ran down the stairs of my porch into the stormy night and began to cross over to my neighbor's lawn,

when suddenly!


My memory brought me back a few weeks prior.
It was a beautiful day, so we were outside with the kids playing.
My son walked across the yard to go to the neighbor's house when he shrieked loudly,

"Mom! There's a snake!"

In the middle of the grass, where our two yards meet, there was a snake...and it was still alive!
My super heroic husband came over and in no time beheaded the snake with a shovel.

No worries...right?

Except...he never told me what kind of snake it was.

All he said was,

"It wasn't a garden snake and you don't want to know what it was."

At that very moment as I entered my neighbor's yard, in the pouring rain, and in the very very dark night...

all I could think of was that snake.


It was an anaconda!

So,
what did I do?

I did what any smart heroic Wonder Woman Mom would do...

I began to run and scream for dear life into the dark of the night!

My flip-flops were soaked and began to slip, then one flew off my foot and into the dark.
This scared me more, so I ran faster.
And the faster I ran, the bigger the snake got.

And it grew friends!
Dozens of them!

I began to run like my life depended on it...
well at least I thought it did at that moment.

I am pretty sure I looked something like this...

Or was it more like this?

Either way...ehemm,

I was running for my life!

For. My. Life!

I finally arrived to my neighbor's door, grabbed the medicine from her, said my "thank you"s, just in time...

to have to run across the yard in the rain and jump over all of the ANACONDAS that were waiting for me in the dark wet grass.

I wish I could say, that by that point, I had gained my composure and had realized in the good functioning brain I had left, that there were no snakes, or that I could conquer whatever await me with strength and agility...

but,

no can do.

I wish I could say that I looked like this, ready to defeat the horror that awaited me...

But,

I am most positive, even though I had no witnesses to concur with me,

that I looked more like this...

At this point,
I began to pray.

Yes, finally...I prayed.


I prayed to make it across the yard with all of my toes still attached and without a snake hanging onto my ankle!

I imagine that I gave my Heavenly Father a nice giggle that night, as He watched me flail around the yard that was completely safe, and empty of all snakes.

(I believe He has an enormous sense of humor, since He created me with one.)

I prayed and quickly began to talk myself across the lawn to safety.


In the end,
after all of the commotion,
I escaped unscathed.

Free of any and all danger.

Whew!
That was close.


I can laugh about that night now, and realize how silly I was to allow myself to be so afraid of something that didn't even exist,
but at the time I was certainly terrified and really fearful.

A grown woman, scared like I was.
Boy, how the mind is a peculiar thing.

Did you know that over 90% of the things that we fear in our minds, never actually come to pass.


Never!


I don't know about you, but I don't want to live a life in fear.
I don't want my fears to get the best of me,
I want to give God the best of me.
I want to draw from the strength and power that God has placed in my heart and let it flow through every area of my life.

We don't have to run from our fears,
but instead, we should run to God with them.

Laying them at His feet.

It's a wonderful thing to be able to go to God with any fear that we have.
Even the silly things that we sometime fear.

Not only is He there to listen, He offers us the gift of peace when we do take our fears to Him.

I want to grab hold of the gift of peace He has offered and let it be my shield of courage!


I am so thankful to have His Well of strength and courage and peace to draw from!


A well that never runs dry.


Never!



Joshua 1:9
This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.


John 14:27
I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.



Psalm 91:4-8
He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection. Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night, nor the arrow that flies in the day. Do not dread the disease that stalks in darkness, nor the disaster that strikes at midday. Though a thousand fall at your side, though ten thousand are dying around you, these evils will not touch you.



Psalm 34:4
I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears.


Mark 5:36
Jesus told him, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.”




Do you have any funny stories to tell about your "Wonder Mom" abilities?

or

What has God revealed to you about a personal fear you may have had?


Please share your thoughts below!

 

The turning 40 post and how I feel about some other stuff.

 

 

Well folks,

I'm officially forty.

 

My birthday was this past Saturday.

 

Woop, woop!

 

I enjoyed a very relaxing birthday huddled in a corner in the fetal position,

 trying to figure out where the past 40 years have gone.

 

HA!

 

Not really. I kid, I kid.

I had a very nice day spent with family,  the best way to spend a birthday.
I got a pedicure with my sister, my step mom and my daughter.
I spent the rest of the day relaxing at home watching movies and the rest of the weekend surrounded by my four favorite people.

They make me smile until my face hurts.

It was nice.

However...
I did wake up on my birthday morning with a pimple on the right side of my chin.
I haven't had a pimple in over ten years, since I was pregnant with my son.

Over ten years!

If this is a sign of what's to come...I'm a little scared.

I'm not feeling too positive yet again this morning,
since that one pimple now has a buddy who resides on the other side of my chin.

Hmmm? That's just weird.

 

I must admit, I am having a little difficulty saying the number.

 

Forty seems to take much more effort to say than thirty-nine even though it's a smaller word.

 

It doesn't roll off the tongue like I thought it would.

 

I'm still getting used to it.

 

I'll let you know in a few weeks if it's gotten any better.

I do have something I feel okay about...

I have decided that since I am now the oldest out of most of my friends, the rest being 39 or younger...whatever,

that they now have to listen to whatever I say.

 

I mean come on, I'm 40.

I'm OFFICIALLY the older and wiser one.

Emphasis on wiser.

 

Right?

 

I'll let you know how my friends deal with my self proclaimed group decision in a few weeks.

 

 

 

Alrighty now...

 

on to something much more important and serious.

 

Let's talk about this little guy...

 

 

 

 

We've all seen him before.

 

The infamous empty cardboard roll.

 

I walked into my kid's bathroom earlier this morning to pick up any dirty laundry lying around (that's an entirely different post for another day)

and found this little guy sitting there.

 

All alone.

Begging to get some attention.

 

 

I looked slightly to my left and saw this hearty guy sitting there...

 

 

Not even half of a foot away was the full roll.

 

THE. FULL. ROLL!

 

 

Now here's my dilemna...

 

do they think that there is some sort of electric shock that comes piercing out of the roll if they TAKE OFF THE OLD EMPTY ROLL AND PUT ON THE NEW FULL ROLL. 

 

Do they?!!!

 

Seriously.

Am I raising human children or monkey people here?

 

Lord help me!

 

This isn't the first time this has happened...

my frustration comes from years of toilet roll neglect.

 

Sometimes I find the little plastic toilet paper holder on the shelf behind the toilet, the empty roll next to the sink (which is right next to the TRASHCAN!) and a half used roll on the floor.

 

I mean really...

what goes on in there?!

 

I've even taken all of the toilet paper out of their bathroom as punishment,

in an attempt to leave them stranded "with their pants down" (pun intended) teaching them a hard earned lesson in responsibility,

but that just leads to crazy frantic screams of "Mom! I need some toilet paper!" from down the hallway while I am attempting to quietly watch an episode of Master Chef or reruns of Good Luck Charlie on Netflix.

 

That irritates me even more, as it then becomes my punishment.

 

Can I just get a little peace here?

Just. a. little.

 

Just a smidge!

 

My husband says they get it from me, except the blisters on my fingers from changing our toilet roll too, tells me otherwise.

 

This all has made me come to a very painful decision.

 

I have decided from here on out...

 

to leave a pile of leaves in my children's bathroom.

 

No toilet paper. Just nice crispy leaves.

A celebration of the Fall season to come.
 

They've left me no choice.

 

 Really...they haven't.
 

Again...I'll let you know in a few weeks how it turns out.

 

 

I hope your having a great Labor Day.

 

May your Labor Day be free of laboring!!

 

 

 

 

Ephesians 4:28

Let him who steals steal no longer; but rather let him labor, performing with his own hands what is good, in order that he may have [something] to share with him who has need.

 

 

Ecclesiastes 2:24-25

There is nothing better for a person than that he should eat and drink and find enjoyment in his toil. This also, I saw, is from the hand of God, for apart from him who can eat or who can have enjoyment?



the UNbucket list

I am normally a leader, but in this one incidence I choose to be a follower.

I saw this on a friend's blog and thought I would have a little fun, and possibly give you a little laugh...the best gift ever!

This is my UNbucket list:
The list of things I DO NOT want to do before I die.
Do. Not.
No way, not gunna do!!

  

Enjoy...

the unbucket list

The list of no-nos before I go-go.

*House a family of raccoons.
Did you know they travel in herds?  Blehck...makes my skin crawl just thinking about it.

*Wear a pair of black leather biker pants.
 I break out in hives with just the thought.
 Plus, they are not made for bodacious booty broads...tis I.

*Participate in an eating challenge on Survivor.
 I throw up in my mouth just watching it on t.v. 

*Wax my eyebrows or any other part of my body.
 I will take my pain unvoluntarily, thank you.

*Pierce my tongue. or lip. or nose. or eyebrow. or anything above or below the waist.
 I think that about covers it.

*Make friends with an anoconda.
Need I say more?

*Walk on hot coals.
I work too hard on keeping my toenails looking nice and dainty, for them, or my flesh, to melt off in that ferocious heat.

*Get a colonoscopy.
 I will fight this to the death!

*Participate in the Mrs. America pageant.
It's something I've been wrestling with for a while.

*Swim with sharks.
I'll leave that for the professionals and the insane.

*Break a limb anywhere on my body and have to wear a cast.
Those things are a hotel for germs.


*Grow a full mustache.
No comment.


*Get Botox injections.
Needles in my face? next to my eyes?  I'll have to pass...



*Be listed on America's Most Wanted television show.
Incognito is my middle name.


*Become a sword swallower.
See comment on "swim with sharks".



*Wear this outfit...in public.

I mean, come on, Fozzie Bear would go much better with my brown eyes.



*Skydive.

Because when I puke, it's going to blow right in that's guys face, and that's just rude.

I am not rude.

For a little bonus,
I asked my children to give me one thing on their unbucket list.

Kaitlyn:

*To be seen by a dinosaur.
 Cuz, if they see you, you have no time to run.  It's all over!


Mason:

*Bunji jumping from a bridge.
Because sometimes I'm scared of heights.



What's on your unbucket list?
I'd love to hear it.
Leave a comment below!